Beverage Superstore presents the tasting room

There are a number of firsts that dads and daughters celebrate together like the first steps, the first word and the first dance recital, but few of these momentous occasions measure up to the one my daughter and I recently shared at the Beverage Superstore in Suwanee. I'm talking of course about my ten-month-old daughter's first wine tasting.

Oh, stop!

I didn't actually let her taste anything, partially because she's ten months old but largely because these wines were all over $55 per bottle. I'm not wasting those libations on a kid whose pallet hasn't yet developed beyond Similac and Gerber stage threes. A mere glass of any of these wines at a restaurant would set me back somewhere between twelve and twenty dollars. As far as I'm concerned, Meryl's going to have to do a little better job earning her keep before dad lets her enjoy the pricy Italian reserves.

For a mere three dollars -- yes, ewe red me write, only three dollars -- I got to have a hearty sampling of five different wines, none of which came from a box and all of which would normally find themselves far outside of Daddy's price range. For a fraction of what it would cost me to sponsor one of those ungrateful hungry children in the Third World, I got to taste from the following bottles:

• Banfi Brunello di Montalcino..............................................$69.99
• Fresobaldi Castel Giocondo Brunello di Montalcino...........$54.99
• Antinori Pian delle Vigne Brunello di Montalcino...............$59.99
• Terra Rossa Brunello di Montalicino..................................$54.99
• Il Palazzone Brunello di Montalcino...................................$59.99

I was in heaven. My Italian consumpton is usually no more exotic than your basic sub-par chianti and the ever-famous That's-a-spicy-meataballa, both of which generally run $4 per box slash can. Here I got to taste the nectar of the gods while hobnobbing with some of Gwinnett County's wine snobs and slobs.

So what if I had to hold a twenty-pound baby the entire time. After I bit her wrist twice, she knew not to reach for Daddy's glass anymore, and the Beverage Superstore provided crackers and bread for her to nibble on. She kept the squealing to a minimum and elicited the usual number of oohs and ahs from fellow lushes wine connoisseurs.

Currently the Beverage Superstore in Suwanee offers wine tastings every Saturday from 1:00 PM to 3:00 PM and for the price this is a real bargain. It was more like a class than a tasting. Meryl and I are taking mom next time, as this made for an ideal date activity especially if you tie it in with a visit to the Suwanee Town Center park. Sure, one of their rules is no alcohol, but with just the right amount of concealment, who's going to be any the wiser?

Gwinnett Stay at home dad discovers hip hop, jehovah's witnesses and non-conformity

Desperate to receive attention from outsiders and afford my child close proximity to other people her height I recently googled "at home parent groups Gwinnett." My plan was to locate a group of people who, like me, spend much of their waking hours contemplating the real nutritional value of Gerber Graduate Veggie Puffs and reading Pat the Bunny. Again.

And again.

My search led me to a new feature on the innerwebs descriptively called meetup.com. Specifically it's geared toward allowing like-minded people to get together based on personal interest. I guess it makes coffee klatches easier to organize. Other groups you might expect are poker groups, Scrabble tournaments, book clubs, and mall walkers.

But wait. That's not all.

A search for my local area brought up groups that would never have dawned on me in a million years including all of but certainly not limited to:

Atlanta Anarchists;
The Atlanta Lord of the Rings Meetup Group; and
The Atlanta Surf Posse;

Ok, before I move on, let me just touch on these three clubs. Are there really any anarchists out there over the age of sixteen? And if so, should they be assembling with other anarchists, the majority of whom are either under the age of sixteen or reporting monthly to a parole officer?

And you Lord of the Rings people . . . I just don't get your fascination with hobbits and whatnot. Something tells me if I pulled up to park outside one of your meeting places, I'd see at least three cars, all of which would don the Frodo Failed: Bush has the Ring bumpersticker. Each of the owners of those vehicles would think he was somehow quirky and unique.

That Atlanta Surf Posse? I'm sorry but have any of you people looked at a map recently? Dude, I'm sure you're little group is gnarly and all but, there's no ocean in the A-T-L. It's time to find a job and eventually some living space outside of your parents' basement.

For your self-righteous , carnal or otherwise shallow enjoyment, here are a few others you might want to click on:

Atlanta Vampire and Non-Conformists Meetup (this group boasts 249 members!):
The Atlanta Goth Meetup Group; (hmm, let me guess. 249 members?
The Cumming Work at Home Moms Meetup Group (sounds naughty but Cumming is actually the name of a nearby city)
The Atlanta Hip Hop and Graffiti Group (What's next? The Atlanta Country Music and Meth-making Group?)

For the more spiritually minded there's the Jehovah's Witnesses Meetups and for those with sore knuckles who don't mind ostracism from the local Kingdom Hall there's the Ex-Jehovah's Witness Meetups.

Sigh.

As you can imagine the list continues with other religious groups, gold digger groups and people I thought only existed on episodes of CSI. While I wasn't able to find a group strictly for at-home fathers, I'll probably either continue the search or start one myself. In the meantime if anyone out there knows of other guys who've mastered the arts of simultaneously emailing and spoonfeeding, let me know.